Readers are advised to remember: the devil is a liar. Not everything that Screwtape says should be assumed to be true even from his own angle.
-C.S Lewis
My dearest Lucius,
It seems like 50 years since we last exchanged ideas. How is Media and the Church in your purview? I was so delighted to hear you are now friends with the church in your territory. You know, the more we are together, the happier we shall be. See the benefits of following my counsel to plague them with sweetness?!
I never really liked your cousin Wormwood’s glee for bitter waters. I tried to restrain him severally through my Brother Screwtape’s letters to him; (Of course, you must have guessed your dearest Aunt was the mastermind behind your grubby Uncle's letter; I only used him an alias because Wormy needed urgent counsel and my license was pending renewal. It was CERTAINLY NOT because a human sent me packing as that abominable Wormwood might have told you). I find it hard to deal with your cousin as he never sees any gain for us in human happiness despite its fleeting nature. He is yet to learn the difference between the awful tasting fruit of the Enemy, 'Joy' and our permissible bait, happiness.
Although, I understand the desire for the stronger more lasting tastes of misery and affliction, these pesky creatures easily turn to the Enemy under suffering; He even calls Himself a Man (eeeeeeeek! the disgustingness of that word) of sorrows. He can be touched with their feelings so our aim is keep them in the realm of The In-Between for as long as possible. Only master Compounders like Screwtape, myself and a few others know how to assay the right level of rancor—low enough to keep them miserable but not so low as to send them Rock Bottom as that would mean them finding the Enemy.
There are many ways to kill a man but till you get your proportions right, I'd counsel you focus on wine... our trusty pleasure intoxicant. You can add as many spices to suit the people. If you cannot keep them in the In-Between, at least you can exhilarate them numb. Their own Manual (you must be a good student of it like our potent Father below) states that when drunk with wine they will say “I was hit but I was not hurt. When shall I go out again for another one?” and just like that, you enslave your addicts. Tell Wormy not to be bothered by their initial happiness. Patience is a key trait of mature Vultures, and leads to the most beautiful part of the story: At the last when they cannot return, it turns bitter in their belly. If our prey would follow the way that leads to destruction, their Book prescribes it should at least seem right to a man... which is usually the path devoid of vivid suffering.
So here lies my proposal. As you well know, we the profoundly deceptive Family of Screws are favorites of Our Father Below. Subtlety wins where strength fails so if you desire a promotion, you must master the art of twisting without necessarily replacing truth. Like dear Eve (a tasty queen who insisted on having her way), the church remains prone to our tactics. Ignorantly of course. They claim to worship the Enemy while unknown to them, Our Father Below is who they truly desire.
It will all have been good news if not that the human race will soon be ended. I doubt we would have a sweeter experience than these grubs. You know, when our Father Below first saw the Enemy's plan to make man, he asked Him if they were the new victuals. The Enemy didn't say what they were. Worse, he refused to let anyone but Himself eat them (oh the Enemy's unfairness Lucius! How can a being be so unjust???). He refused to share man! Of course, we protested. We asked Him what was special about man that He was so mindful of them? He cared for them more than we would have for a fattened calf. Our Father Below just knew The Enemy was about to hide the most serendipitous banquet from us. You should have seen how yummy the first Adam looked when no one had taken their first bite—so reddish and peppery.
Curse you little devil! Don't salivate on the past just yet! Do you not know that though our humans' bodies regrow so we are never entirely foodless, these venison lose their special crunch the longer they spend with us. I thought Hitler or Caiaphas or even Nimrod would retain their first taste but it's the same with all of them... fading aftertaste as the years pass. Hence, we need an unending supply of our delicacy! Not only for a storehouse, but also that, after trying each meal at the Grand Buffet, if there is need to return to the first, its tang can feel new again.
We must hurry. We're not the only cravers of dust. The Enemy still tries to lure them with what He calls 'love.' But we know it's all fibs; He intends to enjoy them forever... by Himself!!!
Don't think of such nastiness too much; there is work to do. Shortly, I will share with you 10 practical steps from my cookbook for sustainable food production. I presented it for my dissertation and the Father of Lies Himself was impressed. (So don't go thinking you can get credits behind me. You'll suffer dearly if you attempt it, I promise you!).
For now, my dearest nephew, set your eyes on the Grand Buffet. Let it spur you crazy to work overtime. The Enemy is always working and we must not give Him any space. Even for those He may have taken, do your best to at least steal (from) them if you cannot kill or destroy them. We need our storehouses full. Imagine you Four Cousins being mentioned as key players supervised by Yours Truly in solving our hunger problem of centuries. You will get to experience firsthand some exceptional individuals that make waiting their lifetime more that worth it. Don't drool just yet!
I want you to ask your Cousin Pathos to teach you his basis of a certain sugary human disease. You'll find it useful for my recipe. More cement to your friendship with the old Lady Kirk.
Your affectionate Aunty,
Torque.
AUTHOR'S NOTE
P.S: Lady Kirk here refers to the informal Scottish terminology of the Church.
Also, whew! This Torque Lady is evilllll. What do you think?
Keep an eye out for part II, Food for the Vultures. More importantly read scriptures. Read John 1. Remember the opening quote. Let Truth remain your reference point. That said, clap, share and let me though your thoughts in the comment section. Thank you and see you soon!💜
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